Prohibition of Weeping Over the Dead
 

The Prophet (A.S.) wept when Hamzah was martyred and said, “As for Hamzah, there are none to mourn him,” and he wept when Ja`fer (al-Tayyar) was martyred and said, “It is for a man like you that mourners should mourn.” He also wept when his son Ibrahim died and said, “The eyes are tearful, and the heart is grieved and we do not say except what pleases the Lord.” He (A.S.) also wept over `Othman ibn Maz`an, Sa`d ibn Mu`ath and Zaid ibn Harithah. The sahaba, too, wept. Jabir wept when his father died. Bashar ibn `Afra’ mourned his father, too. Such incidents abound in the books of hadith and history.[1]

All this proves that there is no prohibition of weeping but on demanding the tears to be shed and to the desire of the Prophet (A.S.) that they should do just that.

Yet, in contrast, we find `Omer ibn al-Khattab prohibiting (women) from mourning the deceased, beating them with his whip for weeping and doing whatever he liked to prohibit them.

`Omer cites a tradition of the Prophet (A.S.) supposedly stating that the deceased is in pain when his family mourns him.[2] We even find `Omer beating Umm Farwah, sister of Abu Bakr, when she mourned her father[3] while we find him ordering people in person to weep over Khalid ibn al-Walid[4]. And `a’isha wept when Ibrahim[5] (son of the Prophet [a]) died. Aba Hurayra wept over `Othman (ibn `Affan), al-Hajjaj over his son[6], Sahab over `Omer[7], and they even use what all these did as arguments.

`Omer himself wept over al-Nu`man ibn Muqrin and over others[8] and the Prophet (A.S.) prohibited him from bothering those who mourned their dead[9].

`a’isha objected to `Omer and to his son `Abdullah reporting such a “tradition” which he upheld, while she attributed it to `Omer’s own forgetfulness, saying, “May Allah have mercy on `Omer! By Allah! The Messenger of Allah (A.S.) never said that Allah would torture any believer on account of his family mourning him. Rather, the Messenger of Allah (A.S.) said that Allah will increase the penalty of the unbeliever through his family mourning over him.” Then she added saying, “Suffices you the Qur’an: `No bearer of sin bears the sin of another.’”[10]

In another narrative, she is quoted as having said, “The Messenger of Allah (A.S.) passed by a Jewess being mourned. He said, `They are weeping over her and she is surely being tortured inside her grave.’”[11]

What `Omer said is disputed also by Ibn `Abbas. A number of Imams from Ahl al-Bayt (A.S.) rejected his “tradition,” too, and anyone who wishes to research it further is advised to consult the references.[12]

[1]Refer to Al-Nass wal Ijtihad, pp. 230-34. Al-Amani, Al-Ghadir, Vol. 6, pp. 159-67. Dala’il al-Sidq, Vol. 3, Part 1, pp. 134-36 citing scores of reliable references. Al-Ista`ab (as referred to in a footnote in Al-Isaba) in the biography of Ja`fer (al-Tayyar), Vol. 1, p. 211. Minhat al-Ma`bad, Vol. 1, p. 159. Kashf al-Astar, Vol. 1, pp. 381-83. Al-Isaba, Vol. 2, p. 464. Al-Majrahan, Vol. 2, p. 92. Al-Sara al-Halabiyya, Vol. 2, p. 89. Refer also to p. 251 as well. Wafa’ al-Wafa’, Vol. 3, pp. 894-95. Refer also to pp. 932-33. Hayat al-Sahaba, Vol. 1, p. 571. Ibn Sa`d, Tabaqat, Vol. 3, p. 396 and Vol. 2, p. 313.

[2]Refer to Al-`Iqd al-Farad, Vol. 4, p. 264 and other books.

[3]Refer to the above stated references and others and to Al-Ghadir and scores of other references as well as p. 158, Vol. 1, of Minhat al-Ma`bad and while discussing Isfahan on p. 61, Vol. 1, quoting Ibn Masa. Ibn Sa`d, Tabaqat, Vol. 3, pp. 209, 346, 362. Refer to the explanation of various traditions on p. 245.

[4]Al-Taratab al-Idariyya, Vol. 2, p. 375. Al-Isaba, Vol. 1, p. 415. Sifat al-Safwah, Vol. 1, p. 655. Usd al-Ghiba, Vol. 2, p. 96. Hayat al-Sahaba, Vol. 1, p. 465 quoting Al-Isaba. Al-Musannaf, Vol. 3, p. 559 in the footnotes of which al-Bukhari, Ibn Sa`d and Ibn Aba Shaybah are quoted. Tarikh al-Khamas, Vol. 2, p. 247. Fath al-Bari, Vol. 7, p. 79. Al-Fa’iq, Vol. 4, p. 19. Al-Qandazi, Raba` al-Abrar, Vol. 3, p. 330. Tarikh al-Khulafa’, p. 88. Ibn Manzar, Lisan al-`Arab, Vol. 8, p. 363.

[5]Minhat al-Ma`bad, Vol. 1, p. 159.

[6]Ibn Sa`d, Tabaqat, Vol. 3 (Dar Sadir’s edition), p. 81. Raba` al-Abrar, Vol. 2, p. 586.

[7]Ibn Sa`d, Tabaqat, Vol. 3, p. 362. Minhat al-Ma`bad, Vol. 1, p. 159.

[8]Al-Amani, Al-Ghadir, Vol. 1, pp. 54, 155, 164. Refer to the biography of al-Nu`man ibn Muqrin in Al-Ista`ab. Refer also to pp. 328-29, Vol. 2, of Al-Riyad al-Nadira about how `Omer wept over that bedouin till he wetted his beard!

[9]Refer to Al-Ghadir where the following references are cited: Ahmed’s Musnad, Vol. 1, pp. 235, 237 and Vol. 2, pp. 333, 408; al-Hakim’s Mustadrak, Vol. 3, pp. 190, 381, where both al-Thahbi, in his Talkhis, and he label this tradition as authentic; Mujma` al-Zawa’id, Vol. 3, p. 17; Al-Ista`ab in the biography of `Othman ibn Maz`an; al-Tayalisi’s Musnad, p. 351; al-Bayhaqi’s Sunan, Vol. 4, p. 70; `Umdat al-Qari, Vol. 4, p. 87 citing al-Nisa’i, Ibn Majah; Ibn Majah, Sunan, Vol. 1, p. 481; al-Hindi, Kanz al-`Ummal, Vol. 1, p. 117; Ansab al-Ashraf, Vol. 1, p. 157. Ibn Sa`d, Tabaqat, Vol. 3, pp. 399, 429; Minhat al-Ma`bad, Vol. 1, p. 159.

[10]Al-Bukhari, Sihah, Vol. 1, p. 146 (1039 A.H. edition). Al-Hakim, Mustadrak, Vol. 3, p. 381. A reference to al-Shafi`i disagreeing with this “tradition” is recorded on p. 266, Vol. 7, of Al-Umm. Jami` Bayan al-`Ilm, Vol. 2, p. 105. Minhat al-Ma`bad, Vol. 1, p. 158. Ibn Sa`d, Tabaqat, Vol. 3, p. 346. Al-Mazni, Mukhtasar as referred to on p. 187, Vol. 1, of Al-Umm. Al-Amani, Al-Gharir, Vol. 6, p. 163 from the above cited references. Muslim, Sihah, Vol. 1, pp. 342-44. Ahmed, Musnad, Vol. 1, p. 41. Al-Nisa’i, Sunan, Vol. 4, pp. 17-18. Al-Bayhaqi, Sunan, Vol. 4, pp. 72-73. Ibn Dawad, Sunan, Vol. 2, p. 59. Ibn Malik, Al-Muatta’, Vol. 1, p. 96.

[11]Al-Bukhari, Sihah, Vol. 1, p. 147.

[12]Refer to Al-Ghadir, Dala’il al-Sidq, Al-Nass wal Ijtihad and others.